I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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