Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
now i know why i became what i already was.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
