Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
