When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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