batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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