Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
