Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
