i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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