quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I am one with the molecules
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Randomize
