ugly people sure do ruin things
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
