There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize