Hey man sorry I got all grabby
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
