I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
