There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
