Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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