I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
