but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Pants are for mortals
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
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