Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
