you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
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