To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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