you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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