Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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