I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
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