she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
we're making bets on your personal life
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
