is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
