she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
