Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
