Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
