is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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