Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
