He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize