i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
