Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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