we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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