Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
