omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize