How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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