Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Randomize
