Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
