my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Randomize
