if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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