it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Do you have feelings for this penis?
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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