ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
