Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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