i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I can't put those talents on a resume
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
