please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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