If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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