I wish I could punch you in the face.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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