He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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