You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
